hey everyone!  i have an exclusive story for you.  are you ready?

from the makers of kyden q. (that’s mama and daddy)…  the sequel!  coming soon, to a hospital near you.

that’s right, I AM GETTING A LITTLE BROTHER!!!  well actually, i don’t know if it’s a boy or a girl, but i’m pretty sure i’m getting a brother.  here’s why:

<– look at this handsome boy.  this is me at 16 weeks gestation.

and this is my new baby at 16 weeks. –>

stunning resemblance!  i am cuter, of course, but baby looks just like me when i was his age, right?  so he must be a boy.  yay for my baby brother!

mama says that she is going to tell everyone that the baby is a boy.  but i’ll let you in on a secret — the only people that actually know whether it’s a boy or girl are mama’s doctors.  she keeps telling them not to spill the beans because she wants to be surprised.  daddy keeps trying to find ways to get a peek at the baby’s private parts so that he can find out the gender.  he says that it would be nice to be able to prepare.  but like mama says, what’s there to prepare for?  baby can use all of my old infant gear and my old clothes.  and even if “he” ends up being a “she”, little girls look cute in blue, right?

baby is due to arrive on august 1, 2011.  if you’re trying to do the math, that would make us 22 months apart.  mama and uncle jamie (her brother) are 23 months apart, and they always had a close relationship growing up together.  i hope that’s how me and my little brother are gonna be, too.  mama and daddy have accepted that their lives are going to be hell for the next few years, but they’re both very excited about our new baby — no matter if it turns out to be a boy or a girl.  i think i’m excited too, but i’m not quite sure.  i’ll keep you posted.

and when information about my sequel goes public, remember where you heard it first… right here on kyden’s korner!

just before my birthday, i got my first haircut.  and boy, was that an ordeal!  daddy did his best to distract me with yogurt puffs, and mama did her best not to snip my ears or give me too many bald spots.  they said that i wasn’t very cooperative.  i kept whipping my head around trying to get a glimpse of that thing that was buzzing in my ear and tickling my head.  mama called them clippers.

for the past 4.5 months, my hair has just been growing and growing… and growing.  my hair got so long that mama was able to bieber-fy me earlier this week.  aaack!  and we don’t even like justin bieber!

so tonight, while i was brushing my teeth, mama started trimming my hair, on impulse.  now, correct me if i’m wrong, but it doesn’t seem like it would ever be a good idea to get an impulse haircut.  but, it obviously wasn’t up to me.  i was brush brush brushing away, and mama was snip snip snipping away.  she just used scissors — no clippers this time.

so what do you think?  i think my new haircut makes my ears look big and my cheeks look fat.  although, it could just be that i have daddy’s big ears and mama’s fat cheeks.  *sigh*  sucks to be me.

oh, and don’t tell daddy about my haircut.  i’m gonna wait and see when/if he notices my new ‘do.

since eating everything wasn’t working out so well for me, i decided to change up my eating habits.  this weekend, i decided to become a part-time vegetarian.  at first mama and daddy thought i was starting to get picky with my food, but after a few meals they figured out what was going on.

on saturday,  we had hot pot with my girls zoe and ava (and their parents) for lunch.  i wouldn’t touch the chicken or the beef, but i stuffed my face with noodles, cabbage, and fruit.  (why am i not sitting in the middle between the girls in this photo???)  and then today we went out for BBQ at lunchtime, and i had zucchini, avocado, chicken, pork ribs, and cheese in front of me.  i gobbled up the cheese and veggies, but i hid the chicken and pork in my chair, in mama’s salad dressing, and on the floor.

mama and daddy were confused — they didn’t understand why i wasn’t eating my meat.  but then they remembered that all weekend, my dinners consisted of mostly meat.  i ate all the meat off my plate, asked for more, and only ate a little bit of my veggies even though i usually cannot get enough of them.

so here’s the deal.  i am a vegetarian at breakfast, second breakfast, lunch, snack, and dessert.  (i just discovered dessert this weekend.  i could live on caramel apples alone!)  and at dinner time, i am a meat-atarian.  you might think it’s strange, but mama told me that one of my older buddies, zachary, went through a phase where he was a vegetarian every other day.  i wonder how long that lasted.

all my life, mama and daddy have talked about what a great eater i am and how they’re so lucky that i will eat anything.  i eat plenty of whole grains and i love fruits and vegetables.  lately, i’ve even been eating spicy things like curry, hot and sour soup, jalapeno bagels, and mu shu chicken with sriracha sauce!  that makes mama happy because she loves spicy food.

last night, i wanted to make mama and daddy really happy by showing them that i really will eat anything.  so i grabbed a spoon out of the dishwasher and brought it over to our weeping fig plant.  i dug up a spoonful of soil from the pot and shoveled it into my mouth.  it was gritty and it tasted like dirt (bleccch!) but i chewed it and swallowed it anyway.  i wanted to make mama and daddy proud.  i didn’t get quite the reaction that i was expecting, though.  mama said that dirt is not for eating.

so when mama took me to clean up after dinner, i thought i’d try again.  like always, she pumped liquid soap on my hands and then turned on the faucet.  but instead of rubbing my hands together under the water, i stuffed the handful of soap into my mouth.  bleccch!  mama said that soap is not for eating.

sheesh!  what else is not for eating — broccoli?  chicken?  i guess i’m on a restricted diet now — no more eating everything.  i think that mama and daddy want me to lose weight.  they keep talking about how fat i’ve gotten lately.  i’m not fat, just a little puffy.  maybe i’m retaining water.

i heard that when mama was a little girl, she ate an entire bottle of baby aspirin, poisonous mushrooms from the lawn, and other stuff that isn’t for eating.  and she wonders where i get it from…

the superbowl used to be a big deal in my family before i came along.  mama and daddy love superbowl parties.  they say that they love watching football, but from what i can tell, superbowl is more about the commercials and junk food.  we went to a party at uncle henry’s house last year, but i was only a few months old, so i barely remember it.  this year, mama and daddy weren’t planning on going anywhere and they didn’t invite anyone over to party.  BOOORING!  so at the very last minute, i took matters into my own hands and invited logan over to watch the game with me.

while mama was busy making pasta salad and daddy was preparing sliders, i was preparing for the game by working on my spiral with my cal football.  yup, i’m just like aaron rodgers (except that he’s not a lefty)!  even though we didn’t have a particular allegiance to either team playing, we cheered for green bay because two of their players went to cal, like mama and daddy did.

green bay won, logan and i got to hang out, and we all got to eat “superbowl food”.  it was a good day.  oh, and i got to see the commercial where darth vader used “the force” to start a car.  i haven’t been able to do that yet, but i’m gonna keep practicing!

thursday was the start of the chinese new year.  starting at midnight, there were firecrackers going off all throughout my neighborhood.  my peeps really know how to party!  apparently, the celebration lasts for 15 days.  i sure hope that there won’t be 15 nights of firecrackers cuz they’re really noisy.

for our chinese new year dinner, mama made broccoli chicken with oyster sauce and steamed egg custard. she said it was chinese food, but gung-gung begged to differ. he wanted traditional dishes — like jai (monk’s stew) — that bak-bak (great-grandma) used to make. i dunno what he was complaining about though, cuz i loved it! and then today, we went out to lunch at a chinese restaurant. we never go out to chinese places because mama doesn’t like the food, but i guess she made an exception since it’s chinese new year. i’m sure glad she did. we ordered hot and sour soup, mu shu chicken, mongolian bbq, and steamed sea bass. i gobbled it all up. and when i was done, i devoured my chinese dessert: a soft-serve ice cream cone. it was delicious! mama said i ate like a little piggy. i sure do love chinese food (especially the dessert).  daddy says that comes from my japanese side.

there are 12 more days of the chinese new year celebration, so i hope we get to go out for chinese food a few more times before it’s over. gung hay fat choy to me!

most kids say “mama” and “dada” as their first words, but not me.  daddy is not amused that i’ll (try to) say “koda” but refuse to say “dada”.

things i like:

• my new la-z-boy chair!  mama bought it for me so i could sit in it and read (which i do), but i have found other uses for it too.  (recliner, drink, tv remote…  what else could a guy want?  wait, where are all the hawt chicks???)
• playing iphone games.  now i can play by myself because i know how to swipe to unlock and launch my apps.  but when i push the wrong button, i need help getting back to the right screen.  (just like gung-gung with the tv remote.)
• zippers.  i could zip and unzip my jacket (or anyone’s jacket) all day long.
• dancing.  i just started doing a new move:  the booty drop.  mama and daddy think it’s so ghetto, but sooo hilarious.  they have no idea where i learned it.
• kissing mama on the cheek all the time, just like she does to me.
• drinking out of my big boy drinking cups.  they are supposed to be for 24+ month old kids, but nothing gets between me and my drinks!
• using a fork to stab anything within arm’s reach.  that includes koda, the table, my cup, my chest, my head, and sometimes my food.
• my daily jog along the creek.  i can run so much faster now that i’ve learned to swing my arms while running
• cleaning.  i like to wipe down the table, fireplace, floors, etc.  sometimes i even take tissues and clean koda with them.
• baaaaa-ing like a sheep.
• saying “mama”.  i know other words, too, but i like saying “mama” all the time.

things i don’t like:

• saying “dada”.  daddy is not very amused by the fact that i’ll say “doda” (koda), but when he asks me to say “dada”, i say “mama”.
• shoes.  i take them off within seconds of getting into the car.

last night, we went to pick up dinner and then headed over to visit auntie char and uncle ed.  when we got to their house, i got two very exciting surprises.  for one thing, we got to eat burritos for dinner.  yum!  at first, mama was sharing her burrito with me, but i kept spitting it out.  she was shocked that i didn’t like it, until she realized that there was HOT salsa in her burrito.  she was trying to set my tongue on fire!  so daddy had to share his (mild) burrito with me, and that made everyone happy.  every but daddy, that is.

and the second surprise…  baby greyson!  when uncle ed first brought him out, i was terrified.  i didn’t even want to look at him.  mama thought i might have been scared because i had never seen a baby so young (11 days old).  but then she remembered that i had met logan when he was only one week old, and he even came over for a sleepover!  but i was so young back then that i barely remember it.

the truth is, when we arrived at baby greyson’s house, i was very hungry.  and when i saw him, i got upset because i thought i was going to have to share my burrito with him.  mama and daddy always make me share my things with other kids, especially when they’re smaller than me.  but once i finished eating, i was much happier.  i followed baby greyson all around his house.  when he went into his room to play in his swing, i followed him in there and didn’t take my eyes off of him.  when his swing stopped moving, i rocked it for him.  and when he fell asleep, i just stood outside his door and watched him sleep.

what seemed like just a few minutes later, baby greyson woke up to eat.  babies sure don’t sleep for very long.  after he ate, auntie char put him down in his bassinet.  but the bassinet was too tall, so i couldn’t see him!  so i walked all around the house calling him: “baby?  baby?  baby?”  he didn’t answer me.  i guess he was sleeping.

when we were getting ready to leave, mama picked me up so i could say bye to baby greyson.  i blew kisses to him and reached out towards him.  mama thought i was trying to give him a hug, but i was actually trying to pick him up so we could bring him home.  isn’t that how kids get little brothers? the whole way home, all night last night, and even this morning, i’ve been looking for him.  “baby?  baby?  baby?”  he’s still not answering me.